Lick my Purity Balls, Baby

Would you pledge your virginity to your father?: News: glamour.com

So this is somewhat disturbing and VERY weird. These Purity Balls have gained popularity among right-wing evangelical Christians and spurned them on to promote chastity and virginity among their youth in a fashion that's a cross between a debutante ball and a weird Mormon marriage ceremony. If you read the article, you'll see that these fathers want to protect their dear little daughters against the big, bad sex monster, pledging to fight for their chastisty while the daughters promise to remain pure. My guess? Half of these 15 year olds have probably already sucked a guy's dick or held one in their hand, while a small percentage of them probably have had anal sex. But, of course, that doesn't count. Any self-respecting Catholic girl will tell you, taking it up the ass is the best way to ensure you're telling the truth at confession and the best way to prevent the death of the maiden -- pregnancy. I believe that these girls will "wait until marriage" just like I believe that Paris Hilton will remain celibate for a year. Puh-leeese. I feel sorry for these young women. Granted, they may have incredible relationships with their fathers, but their future husbands are going to have a lot to contend with and way more than that to live up to. AND once their marriage starts to go awry, these has-been virgins will go out whoring to make up for lost time, and not even do it safely cuz they never were taught how to in the first place, for fear that it would make them promiscuous. God help us. God help us all.

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